Same old for a different mold?

Really, really sick and down today - just had the pits of a day. Amazing how one week can be great and the next ridiculously hard. I'm sure I must think too much but how do I not do that? besides, I like thinking.

I spent the whole day in bed unable to sleep, I felt so depressed I couldn't do any activity and the movies I strglled through wewre either mildy disturbing or just boring. I feel so purposeless during these times. Not the 'real me'. i went for a walk to the shops and ended up walking way further than expected. It was dark and my legs were wobbly from exhaustion yet I had this drivenness to keep going because anything is better than lying in bed with your own thoughts. The messyness of the house (it wasn't very messy) makes me feel out of control, the list of the tiniest things to do like have a shower put me under huge pressure. I know I have Chromnic Fatigue Syndrome and Depression but why still these terrible days in the midst of such good ones?

I feel really alone, thank God for Andrew and Lyn who really understand me.

Jesus pleas help us and bless my beautiful and loving husband who puts up with this fragile vessel. And please bless Megan and please may people's eyes be opened with understanding, including mine.

The same old stuff is happening but I really believe I am changing for the better, jesus is changing me and molding me.

Anna :)